For the longest time, seeing a therapist was a kind of “dirty little secret” that you only shared with your spouse or a very close friend. The stigma against needing help prevented many people from getting help when they needed it. As time goes on, the world of mental health services has expanded dramatically. Therapy is no longer stigmatized the way it once was, but not everyone understands just what it entails, how they know if it might help, or even how it might help at all!
Today, let’s talk about all that and more!
When you think of therapy, what is the first thing that comes to mind?
Maybe it’s a long couch and a person with a notepad, wearing a tweed jacket as they scribble down potential insights about your father. Or, maybe you picture something more institutional with white walls and a circle of people talking about the hallucinations they see when they try to sleep.
These are two of the images that have entered our collective unconscious when it comes to defining what therapy looks like or how it works. They both have their basis in reality – Sigmund Freud was a big fan of 3-piece tweed suits and inpatient group therapy for severe mental illness does exist – but the majority of therapy is very … normal-looking.
Imagine a comfortable office with a few nice chairs or a classic couch. Your therapist sits across from you in their own chair, usually only a few feet distant, and focused entirely on you.
You talk. About whatever is on your mind that day, that week, that year. You share what you need to share to get where you want to go.
They listen. Contrary to popular belief, many therapists do a surprising amount of not talking during sessions.
Therapy is primarily a conversation you have with someone who has trained to listen well, provide feedback, help you tease out meaning, and maintain unconditional positive regard for you as a person.
Therapy vs. Advice
There is a big difference between engaging in therapy and receiving advice from another person. Advice is often very one-sided, based on the other person’s opinion or subjective experience, and generalized. Many people give advice with the best of intentions, but can often miss the point of what you need and focus on what they think you want to hear.
Therapy is not intended to “tell you what to do” or provide anecdotal steps that might be effective for your specific needs. Therapy is based on ethics, research, results, and healing that stem from what you bring into each session, what is important to you, and how you live your life.
Even if your friend or family member is a licensed therapist, the ACA Code of Ethics they follow explicitly forbids them from providing those services to you because it causes a conflict of professional interest.
How Do I Know if I Need Therapy?
Most people go through periods of ups and downs, success and failure, sadness and happiness, peace and anxiety. These experiences are part of what it means to be human, so it can be hard to know when they progress from “natural parts of life” into “clinically significant issues.” When that does happen, therapy might be a good avenue to explore.
A good indicator for seeking help is when your thoughts, feelings, and actions start to negatively impact your life. Sadness is normal, but depression that has you staying in bed 20 hours per day and refusing to eat isn’t healthy. Being worried about big events at work is very common, but actively missing work, social events, or deadlines because you are too anxious to get things done is a red flag. When your life is suffering, therapy is a good option to explore.
I can usually handle my own problems.
The key word in this statement is, “usually”. When the scope of an issue goes beyond the usual, the way you deal with it needs to go beyond the usual, too. Even if you have a way to deal with things, recurring problems of the same type may be an indicator that instead of “dealing with” the problem, you’re putting a lid over it only for a short time.
Like physical wounds, treatment needs to meet the injury. You wouldn’t put a band-aid on a cut that needs stitches, right? Mental health is the same.
Some specific areas where therapy is a good idea include…
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Going through crisis
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Long periods of depression or anxiety
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Major life transitions
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Complicated family problems
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Relationship troubles
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Managing addiction or substance abuse
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Wanting to better your mental health in general
What are the Benefits of Getting Therapy?
Therapy can help you LEARN…
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Coping skills
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Conflict resolution
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How to build a health support system
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A better understanding of your mental health
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How to identify wellness goals
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How to identify what triggers distress
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How to deal with a serious life change
Therapy can help you IMPROVE…
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Communication with friends, family, partners, and coworkers
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Intimacy in your personal relationships
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Bonds with your loved ones
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Day-to-day functioning such as concentration or substance use
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Routines and stability
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Sleep quality
Therapy can help you FEEL…
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Empowered
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Safe to explore your thoughts, feelings, and concerns
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Increased happiness and contentment
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More motivated
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Less overwhelmed
Therapy can help you OVERCOME…
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Chronic stress
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Anger, depression, anxiety, mania, and other serious concerns
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Relapse into old, unhealthy mental states
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Eating disorders
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Trauma
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Fear
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Thoughts of self-harm or suicide
Where can I Receive Therapy?
Traditionally, therapy was completed in an office or hospital setting, depending on what the client needed at the time. Since the COVID-19 pandemic, options have expanded to include virtual meetings with a therapist using one of the many video meeting options on the market today. The only way to know what a therapist offers is to ask!
At Village Counseling, we offer in-person and virtual therapeutic services for a wide variety of needs.
Click to learn about our online therapy sessions or our same-day option!
How can I Find a Great Therapist for Me?
It can be difficult and frustrating to find a therapist that works for you. Much of the search comes down to compatible personalities and expectations. Start by reading the profile of therapists in your area, paying particular attention to the ones who see clients that have similar needs to your own. If you feel like you may be depressed, focus on therapists that specialize in depression, for example.
From there, read about their theoretical orientation (i.e. what kind of theory guides their practice, such as cognitive/behavioral or person-centered) and their experience. Some factors that might matter to you are the populations they primarily work with (e.g. age group, gender, or religious orientation), but what matters to you is ultimately up to you.
Our therapists at Village Counseling have a wide variety of specialties, experience, and personalities.
Check out our Therapists page for details!
Wrapping it Up
Choosing to start therapy is a personal decision that takes bravery and a willingness to work towards the best you that you can be. Many people seek help for “traditional” mental health concerns like depression and anxiety, but many others see a therapist to work through big life changes or learn how to communicate better with their loved ones. Regardless of the reason behind the decision, the benefits of regular therapeutic sessions are many. From better sleep to better thinking, fighting back against substance abuse or preventing a relapse; therapy can do anyone and everyone a world of good.